To my throne.

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I’m a very visual person. Every time I look around I’m trying to see the world. I say “trying” because when you’re amidst working through your life you barely have time to see anything. People are always jumping out at you! Pointing!

Look over here,” “Hey you! This needs your attention” “And this! This needs your mind, your body, your soul…“.

Their demands make you numb and confused with what it was you were focusing on. Having things imposed upon you to honour may seem like a push towards the correct decisions you should make in life. This helps when you’re young and clueless. However, as you get older, the danger is getting used to this form of “help”. You become scared of venturing out, alone, into the unknown fortress that defines who you are. But what is really scary is carrying on in that same way. Not evolving to earn your own crown. Instead you look manically about you to what people are pointing fingers, thinking it’s going to be like that for the rest of your life. Your head tries to keep up with the stories being thrown around at you to see.

Social interaction number 1: are your thoughts as relevant as mine? Let’s judge by how many favourites and retweets.
Social interaction number 2: is your life as relevant as mine? Let’s judge by how many friends like you.
Social interaction number 3: Is what you see as superior as me?Let’s judge by how many of your followers have given you their hearts.

It seems like there is some form of dictation each time you expose a part of yourself. In the end you’re put in a ring to fight with your own ego. You want to make a difference because you are an individual being, but to be considered you have to conform to one medium.

Stories coming in from the left!
Stories coming in from the right!

Popularity is power. That’s the struggle you can’t dodge, because you have to stay “informed” and “current“. There’s no time for a break to absorb the information and act according to your own judgement. It’s a formulaic approach, and it ticks all the right boxes for people who consider ageing in life as growth.

Then it happens. You’ve taken a hit too hard and you’re on the ground. That’s when you realise in reality you have been the ground. People have been rubbing the dirt off of their feet on you. You’ve been stepped on for way too long, and now your super-ego creeps up on you to hit you with a shovel. Its critical and moralising role striking away at what others see as dirt to find the hidden treasure.

Watch out, can’t you see what is ahead?
Tut, tut, all your abandoned issues have buried you amongst the dead!

They fall down into the darkness of your repressed mind. Reduced to small code like structures that contain messages and plans. They are amino acids hoping to transcript and translate into an inimitable man. 

You’re head is clouded. All you see is grey skies but you’ve been rendered incapable to tell if it’s the weather or if it’s what you are feeling inside. They have trained you senseless and now you have become desensitised.

Don’t get back up off the ground, you are better off here – where you lie. Head buried so deep you’ve turned things around, you’ve become the person who leads the new life you’ve found. In the process those societal puppeteers have cut their ties in the name of: disobedient acts and freedom crimes.

I buried my head deep in the sand till I came out a changed man. Carrying a bucket full of unique thoughts, my life, and a sword from the self-acceptance battle I have so long fought. Reclining upon my throne today, a king of hearts! I have earned my crown, at last. 

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One thought on “To my throne.

  1. Hi, I’m a new reader to your blog :) This is really inspiring so thank you. Keep writing, I look forward to reading it!!! P.s, don’t let anybody get you down :D

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